Stunning Cunt
Friday December 9, 2005

By Grace Green

MARSEILLES, France -- Skirt-chasing playboy Daniel Anceneaux spent weeks
talking with a sensual woman on the Internet before arranging a romantic
rendezvous at a remote beach -- and discovering that his on-line sweetie of
six months was his own mother!

"I walked out on that dark beach thinking I was going to hook up with the
girl of my dreams," the rattled bachelor later admitted. "And there she was,
wearing white shorts and a pink tank top, just like she'd said she would.

"But when I got close, she turned around -- and we both got the shock of our
lives. I mean, I didn't know what to say. All I could think was, 'Oh my God!
it's Mama!' "

But the worst was yet to come. Just as the mortified mother and son realized
the error of their ways, a patrolman passed by and cited them for visiting a
restricted beach after dark.

"Danny and I were so flustered, we blurted out the whole story to the cop,"
recalled matronly mom Nicole, 52. "The policeman wrote a report, a local TV
station got hold of it -- and the next thing we knew, our picture and our
story was all over the 6 o'clock news. "People started pointing and laughing
at us on the street -- and they haven't stopped laughing since."

The girl-crazy X-ray technician said he began flirting with normally
straitlaced Nicole -- who lives six miles away in a Marseilles suburb --
while scouring the Internet for young ladies to put a little pizzazz in his

"Mom called herself Sweet Juliette and I called myself The Prince of
Pleasure, and unfortunately, neither one of us had any idea who the other
was," said flabbergasted Daniel.

"The conversations even got a little racy a couple of times.

"But I really started to fall for her, because there seemed to be a
sensitive side that you don't see in many girls.

"She sent me poems she had written and told me about her dreams and desires,
and it was really very romantic.

"The truth is, I got to see a side of my mom I'd never seen before. I'm
grateful for that."

When starry-eyed Daniel asked Sweet Juliette to send him a picture, Nicole
e-mailed him a photo of a curvy, half-clad cutie she'd scanned from a men's

"The girl in the picture was so beautiful, I begged Juliette to meet me on
the beach -- and Mom said yes," he recalled. "Mom says she was falling for
me, too, and she just wanted to meet me, even though she knew I'd be
disappointed when I saw her.

"As for me, I figured I was going to find the girl of my dreams.

"I guess that's about as wrong as I've ever been."

Daniel admits he and his mother could do little but stammer and stutter
around each other for days after their cyberspace exploits came to light.
And his father Paul -- Nicole's husband of 27 years -- wasn't too happy when
the story hit the news and his beer-drinking buddies made him the butt of
their jokes.

"Dad was ticked for a while and he forbid Mom to talk to anybody on the
Internet ever again," said embarrassed Daniel.