Inappropriate things to say during sex

damion Sep 10, 2003

  1. damion

    damion Pound Shop Alex Petridis

    Threads:
    273
    Messages:
    3,653
    Likes Received:
    4
    Trophy Points:
    38
    Location:
    what in tintern abbey are you talking about?
    10. "You know, you look a little bit like frank skinner in this light."

    9. "You know, you look a little bit like raja ram in this light."

    8. "They should never have done that to the one way system. It's a disgrace."

    7. "What was the name of that bloke who presented chock-a-block?"

    6. "What's your mum's number again?"

    5. "There's no place for a flat back four these days. Sven needs to embrace a more dynamic, fluid formation which would accommodate players' individual flair."

    4. "Five thirty i paid for twenty fags in waterloo station the other week."

    3. "Five pounds fucking thirty."

    2. "Can we hurry up, only I was planning to do something productive with my evening."

    1. "I need a crap, you don't mind if I just lay one here do you?"
     
  2. jamez_23

    jamez_23 Blah

    Threads:
    41
    Messages:
    5,354
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    36
    1. My name is Matthew Kelly - welcome to stars in their eyes .....
    2. So THATS where my keys were ....
     
  3. _PsyMike

    _PsyMike Guest

    </div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td>QUOTE (damion @ Sep 10 2003, 01:35 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'> 1. "I need a crap, you don't mind if I just lay one here do you?" [/quote:6f4bbddcaa]
    damion....u are a bad bad man!! :no: lol :lol:
     
  4. Sailor Moon

    Sailor Moon Member

    Threads:
    48
    Messages:
    656
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    16
    Location:
    Bristol
    Do you mind taking a little break? My back is soar...

    :rolleyes:
     
  5. Snowdog

    Snowdog Junior Members

    Threads:
    6
    Messages:
    54
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    0
    Location:
    Dublin, Ireland
    1. Your sister is much better.

    2. You are realy bad at this.

    3. I am out of condoms, can i use a sock?

    4. When is this going to get good?

    5. Its nothing dangerous, just a rash....

    6. Is 500,- ok?.

    7. Dont tell my wife.

    8. Whats that tuna smell...

    9. I think the condom bursted 10 minutes ago.

    10. What was your name again?
     
  6. Red five

    Red five jah mangled spanner

    Threads:
    437
    Messages:
    11,290
    Likes Received:
    16
    Trophy Points:
    38
    Location:
    that would be telling
    1. Have you ever thought about jesus?

    2. My ex used to do it like this...

    3. Blimey! I got an echo then...

    4. Which one are you...? oh.

    5. is that it?

    6. whats for dinner?

    7. put your hair into bunches I wanna ride you like a motorbike...

    8. You haven't really done this much have you?

    9. all you need is a bit of training up.

    10. "Sweet JESUS, I did didn't I" (say this afterwards, they love it...)
     
  7. skwelch

    skwelch Senior Member

    Threads:
    5
    Messages:
    1,038
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    36
    :dlol: :dlol: :dlol: :dlol:
     
  8. mangakitten

    mangakitten Guest

    You could get that fixed on the NHS, you know...
     
  9. Monkey Do

    Monkey Do #1 Internet Toughguy

    Threads:
    478
    Messages:
    7,498
    Likes Received:
    2
    Trophy Points:
    38
    Location:
    I'm touching myself as I write this post.
  10. Shroomy

    Shroomy Lazy perfectionist

    Threads:
    12
    Messages:
    1,049
    Likes Received:
    1
    Trophy Points:
    36
    Location:
    Trondheim
    Shouting someone else's name is never good, or worse your mom's name (or "mom") just when you're about to cum... :crazy:
     
  11. Monkey Do

    Monkey Do #1 Internet Toughguy

    Threads:
    478
    Messages:
    7,498
    Likes Received:
    2
    Trophy Points:
    38
    Location:
    I'm touching myself as I write this post.
    >Did I tell you the results of my HIV test?

    >Do you mind if the dog joins us?

    >Urgh! tastes like battery acid!

    >It'll hurt less when you reach your teens.

    >Bollocks, it's the old bill...better pull over.

    >Ouch, I think I just got a bit of sweetcorn jammed down my japseye

    >Right, that proves it then...I'm gay.
     
  12. josh

    josh marathon solo-sessionahoy

    Threads:
    525
    Messages:
    8,230
    Likes Received:
    26
    Trophy Points:
    38
    Location:
    London
    </div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td>QUOTE (Monkey Do @ Sep 10 2003, 09:00 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'>
    >It'll hurt less when you reach your teens [/quote:25d20f6309]
    oh no!!! :lol1: :lol1: :lol1: thats exactly something like a friend of mine would say :Smile3:
    The other night, he was with his girlie and just as theyre about tocome, he stops and asks her about the Nasdaq stock exchange :lol: :lol:
    On previous occasions, he has (purposely) called out her sisters name, her best mates name and his ex's name - apparently, it brings a brilliant stop to the proceedings every time :Grin:
     
  13. damion

    damion Pound Shop Alex Petridis

    Threads:
    273
    Messages:
    3,653
    Likes Received:
    4
    Trophy Points:
    38
    Location:
    what in tintern abbey are you talking about?
    word josh, sounds like the "rodeo shag"....

    1. mount from behind, get a good grip on shoulder and under stomach, "to ensure a good purchase".

    2. Lean forward and whisper "I'm thinking about <insert her best mate's name here>"

    3. See how long you can hold on for :Smile3:
     
  14. natacherry

    natacherry Snoozing..

    Threads:
    16
    Messages:
    2,253
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    36
    Location:
    North London
    oh my god...if my boyfriend ever did that i would be sooooooooooooooo angry! :angry: shit...i would seriously consider killing him
     
  15. Mrs B

    Mrs B Real world? What's that?

    Threads:
    8
    Messages:
    5,375
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    0
    Location:
    Maidstone
    excuse me I think Im gonna be sick

    pass the ashtray

    hurry up eastenders is on in a minute

    are you in yet :o

    what do you call that?
     
  16. natacherry

    natacherry Snoozing..

    Threads:
    16
    Messages:
    2,253
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    36
    Location:
    North London
    especially if he used his exgirlfriends name or someone else where i kno they might still fancy him....grrrr
     
  17. Stix

    Stix Guest

    oh god Mrs B - I've actually had that said to me... (excuse me I think I'm gonna be sick) the curse of booze, smokes and erm 'exercise' :lol:

    .. I don't find you sexually attractive.
    .. you're doing nothing for me.
    .. you have no tits when you stand up either.
    .. can my mate join in? He's better than you at that.
    .. do you mind if I take an afrodisiac first?
    .. do you mind if turn the light off.
    .. don't worry, the doctor told me not to worry about that secretion.
     
  18. Red five

    Red five jah mangled spanner

    Threads:
    437
    Messages:
    11,290
    Likes Received:
    16
    Trophy Points:
    38
    Location:
    that would be telling
    </div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td>QUOTE (damion @ Sep 11 2003, 01:12 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'> word josh, sounds like the "rodeo shag"....

    1. mount from behind, get a good grip on shoulder and under stomach, "to ensure a good purchase".

    2. Lean forward and whisper "I'm thinking about <insert her best mate's name here>"

    3. See how long you can hold on for :Smile3: [/quote:01a29449c5]
    we call it buckaroo in these parts. except you hold their hair and whisper "I've got aids" then hold on for dear life. BUCKAROO!
     
  19. Stix

    Stix Guest

    female version..


    I think I fancy your best mate..
     
  20. natacherry

    natacherry Snoozing..

    Threads:
    16
    Messages:
    2,253
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    36
    Location:
    North London
    thats sick and horrible.... :no:
     
  1. This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
    By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.
    Dismiss Notice