The Magic Vibrator

Squagnut

There's a gnu in my squat
A guy goes into a sex shop and says to the assistant "I'm going away on business and will be out of the country for 6 months. I want to buy a really good sex toy to keep my wife amused whilst I'm gone so she doesn't look elsewhere"

"I have just the thing" says the assistant. "New in stock the Magic Vibrator". He goes under the counter and brings out a large box.

"That looks just like any ordinary vibrator to me" says the guy

"Watch this" says the assistant and takes the lid off the box and says "Magic Vibrator - Door". The vibrator flies out of the box and attaches itself to the door and starts vibrating vigorously.

"Holy sh*t" says the guy "I'll take that for sure"

A few weeks later his wife decides to try it out and opens the box and shouts "Magic Vibrator - crotch". Several climaxes later she decides she has had enough but can't remember what her husband said she had to say to remove it. She tries out several things but it still carries on. Feeling quite dizzy now she decides she had better try and drive herself to the hospital to see if they can help her.

Driving through town she is veering all over the road at every climax and a traffic cop spots her and pulls her over.

She explains about the vibrator and she's really sorry but she has to get to the hospital soon

The traffic cop stares at her and says "I've heard everything now - Magic Vibrator - My Arse"......
 

lurk

Stunning Cunt
:ilol:

this one doesn't deserve a thread of it's own, but it's fairly amusing anway:

Richard met Sharon in a nightclub.
They enjoyed each other's company very much and at the end of the evening Sharon invited Richard to her place, where they quickly got involved in a very passionate and energetic session in bed together.

Finally, tired and satisfied, they both lay back in the bed and snuggled up close to each other.

After a short while, Sharon began tenderly stroking Richard's manhood.

Surprised but appreciative, Richard comments, "Surely you can 't be ready for more already?

Sharon replies with a sad look, "No, but every now and then I get a bit nostalgic, and I miss the days when I had mine "
 

pugzly

um...
heard this joke b4 but it was'nt a magic vibrator it was a voodoo pines lol
 
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